Courtship Forum

Author: Alade Joel

  • 7 types of people marriage is not for.

    Not all of us will marry. Not all of us should. In fact, some of us should run away from Marriage. It’s not necessarily because you are bad, or will be a bad spouse or parent but it’s just that marital union isn’t meant for someone like you.

    If you belong to any of these groups, don’t think of marriage:



    1. Hate Accountability

    You are someone who hates to be accountable for anything.
    You don’t want anyone to know about you, finances (income and expenses), movements, who you vibe with and move with, what you do and what you don’t. You don’t want anybody asking you why, how, when, or who, marriage is not for you.

    Your spouse is the remnant of your life, a partner, a co-parent and helper, so you’ve got to let him/her into your life. You just have to share it with the person you call husband or wife, even before they ask.

    If you are sharing bodies, you must share details.

    If you can’t deal, marriage is not for you.



    2. Lazy:

    In whatsoever forms – physical, Spiritual, mental.
    Marriage is work and you are gonna put a lot of things, systems, prayers, energy into it for it to work as God intended it to work.

    If you are not ready to put your 100% into this thing called marriage, don’t think of it.



    3. Hate sex:

    Sex is good. Sex is God-ordained for the married. It is the second reason for marriage and you will (or must) have loads of it in marriage.
    If sex irritates you due to:

    • Trauma
    • Fear
    • Medical or hormonal issues
    • Emotional wounds


    Those things can often be treated or worked through with medical care, counselling, and patience.
    However, if you are unwilling to seek help, communicate, or grow in this area, marriage which includes intimacy  will be deeply challenging.


    4. One  Sexual or Reproductive Health Challenges or the other.


    Some people struggle with:
    Erectile dysfunction

    • Pain during sex
    • Hormonal imbalance
    • Irregular menstruation
    • Congenital or acquired conditions


    These are medical issues, not moral failures and many are treatable or manageable.
    Marriage is not forbidden for people with health challenges.
    But refusing diagnosis, treatment, or honest conversation with a potential spouse is unfair and harmful.
    The Bible clearly recommends celibacy for you.



    5. Unforgiver:

    If you find it hard to forgive, don’t bother to marry because it will be hard for you in it.

    You see, marriage is a union of two forgivers. We can’t just do with sinning against one another, but we can have a happy home if we find it easy to forgive quickly, even when the offender is yet to realize his/her offences.

    6. Not responsible


    Marriage is not a hobby, a social status, or a playground.
    It demands:

    • Sacrifice
    • Commitment
    • Hard work


    Love in action, not just words
    If you want benefits without responsibility, marriage will eat you alive.

    All these defects can be worked on if you are ready, but if you can’t, please stay out of marriage. It’s not for someone like you.

    Which set of people do you think marriage is not for?

    Meet me in the comment section for the seventh one.

  • WHAT YOU STAND TO GAIN AS A FULL HOUSEWIFE

    WHAT YOU STAND TO GAIN AS A FULL HOUSEWIFE



    Dear Lady, marriage is blissful and nature has equipped you to be a homemaker, family nutritionist and many other roles you hold in the house.

    That is more than going out and earning money or contributing financially to the house.

    Isn’t that man’s job?

    But you will gain nothing in being a full housewife in this 21st century than

    – a closed mouth

    – a closed destiny

    – loss of self-identity and

    – boredom

    Because the man who is paying the piper will dictate the tunes (he is a human being)

    But we will those who did it and are glad for it?

    How many of them? Probably one of twenty.

    Finally, you can contribute to the house and still be a great wife with a voice, an identity and a life.

    The two can coexist.

    If you agree, share. Comment and like.

  • 15 Places To meet Your Future Spouse in 2026

    15 Places To meet Your Future Spouse in 2026

    1. Religious gatherings or events, such as church or temple services, retreats, or conferences.


    2. Online dating sites or apps, which can connect you with people who share your interests and values.


    3. Social clubs or groups, such as sports teams, book clubs, or hobby groups.


    4. Volunteering or charity events, where you can meet people who are passionate about giving back to their community.


    5. Meetup groups, which bring people together based on shared interests and activities.


    6. Classes or workshops, such as cooking classes, language lessons, or art classes.


    7. Networking events, which can be a great opportunity to meet new people who work in your industry or share your professional interests.


    8. Speed dating events, which can be a fun and efficient way to meet a lot of potential partners in a short amount of time.


    9. Weddings or other celebrations, where you may be introduced to friends or family members of the couple.


    10. Coffee shops or cafes, which can be a casual and low-pressure environment to strike up a conversation with someone new.


    11. Museums or art galleries, which can provide a great opportunity to meet someone with similar interests in the arts.


    12. The gym or fitness classes, where you can meet someone who shares your passion for exercise and staying healthy.


    13. Local festivals or fairs, which can be a fun and festive way to meet new people in your community.


    14. Dog parks or pet stores, which can be a great way to meet fellow animal lovers and potentially connect with someone who shares your love for pets.


    15. Alumni events or reunions, which can provide an opportunity to reconnect with old classmates and potentially meet someone new who went to your school.

  • 8 Online Businesses Husband and Wife Can Do.

    8 Online Businesses Husband and Wife Can Do.

    Online businesses offer flexibility, low startup costs, and the opportunity for couples to grow together financially and emotionally.
    Here are realistic side hustles husband and wife can do together in Nigeria:



    Blogging and Content Creation

    Family contents are becoming popular these days. Couples can run or start a family  YouTube, TikTok or Facebook focused on faith, marriage, parenting, lifestyle, devotional or finance. With time, they can be monetize.

    My wife and I run House of J&V. Subscribe to the channel, pleaseeee!



    Social Media Management

    Many small businesses  need help managing Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok pages. One spouse can create content while the other handles scheduling, analytics, and client communication.



    Online Coaching or Counselling


    Couples skilled in marriage counseling, parenting, fitness, academics, or faith-based mentoring can offer paid sessions via Zoom or WhatsApp.



    Freelancing Services

    If either spouse has skills like writing, graphic design, web design, data analysis, or video editing, freelancing platforms can be a gold-mine. Together, you can deliver faster and better.



    Online Courses and Digital Products

    Couples can create and sell ebooks, devotionals, online classes, or templates for sale on selar or Amazon KDP. This is especially powerful for teachers, ministers, and professionals.



    Online Tutoring

    Couples who are Teachers can start an online tutorial classes. Many Nigerians who are abroad already need extra classes for their wards.


    Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labour.  Ecclesiastes 4:9



    Online Event Hosting

    Couples can host webinars, marriage classes, Bible studies, or business trainings online and monetise through registration fees or sponsorships.


    Faith-Based Media Ministry

    For Christian couples, running a digital ministry, podcasts, devotionals, prayer rooms, or family content can combine purpose with income through donations, ads, and partnerships.



    Online businesses allow couples to work as partners, not competitors. However, success requires clear roles, trust, communication, and patience. When done right, working together can strengthen both your finances and your marriage.

    Which of these online businesses do you and your spouse feel drawn to? Start the conversation today. Choose one idea, pray about it, assign roles, and take the first small step. If this article blessed you, share it with another couple and leave a comment and don’t forget to follow me.

  • Let us pray with Psalm 4:8

    Psalm 4:8 | Psalm of the Day
    Today’s Psalm is a gentle reminder that true peace and safety come from the Lord alone.
    In a world full of noise and uncertainty, God invites us to lie down and rest in Him. May this verse bring calm to your heart and peace to your home today.
    🙏 So, let’s pray here


    👉 Join us on our 100 Psalms in a Year journey.

    💬 Feel free to share what this Psalm means to you.

  • From Government to Marriage: The Trust Problem

    From Government to Marriage: The Trust Problem

    Recently Nigeria passed New Tax Acts which have been causing a lot of uproars of social spa e

    On paper, the new tax act is good; it exempts a lot of Nigerians, and it is progressive in nature, but do you know why many are sceptical of its implementation?

    One is misinformation engineered by a minority of people who have one grouse or another to grind with the government of the day, and a lack of trust. I will focus on the latter.

    Successive Nigerian Governments have not been known to be good custodians of our commonwealth.

    They have stolen. They have killed and they have destroyed.

    An average Nigerian has zero trust in his government because he has been let down repeatedly over and over again.

    He has been told to endure while his government and their cronies waste resources all around.

    Why should he now trust this one when he, the government, has not shown any iota of change from what his predecessors are known for?

    He is like that serial cheating husband who suddenly develops a plan of romantic activities for his wife when he hasn’t shown a clear way of repenting.

    Dear, don’t ever come to a point in your marriage where your partner can’t trust you again.

    A point where you are just in the union just for being in it’s sake.

    A point where every step of yours is misconstrued as an avenue to more abuses and irresponsibility.

    And trust me, this point of total mistrust is not from one-off mistakes, it is arrived at from repeated mistakes.

    Don’t ever let trust go out of your marriage for it is the currency of the union.

    Thanks for reading.

    God bless Nigeria.

    God bless our marriage in Jesus

  • Psalm 3:3–4 | Psalm of the Day | 100 Psalms in a Year | House of J&V

    Psalm 3:3–4 | 100 Psalms in a Year
    Hi! My name is Joel, and welcome to the House of J&V.

    Watch here



    Today’s Psalm is Psalm 3:3–4, a powerful reminder that the Lord is our shield, our glory, and the One who lifts our heads.
    This video is part of our 100 Psalms in a Year journey — reading God’s Word consistently to build faith, hope, and godly homes.
    👉 Subscribe for more daily Psalms and Christian encouragement.
    📅 See you at the next Psalm.

  • Journey with Me

    Journey with Me

    Hello oOoOO. Let me welcome you to 2026.

    It shall be our year of divine progress, speed and goodness.

    To start with, thank you for being here with throughout the last year and I am appreciative of your presence this year too.

    Let’s Journey Together.

    This year, We will be doing many amazing things together. First is 100 Psalms In A year on my YouTube Channel, The House of J&V.

    Psalm of the Day | 100 Psalms in a Year by House of J&V | Video 1 dropped today

    This video is part of our 100 Psalms in a Year journey, where we read and reflect on selected Psalms throughout the year to strengthen our faith, build godly homes, and draw closer to God.

    You can watch the video here:



    If you’re looking for daily encouragement, scripture reading, and faith-centred family content, you’re in the right place.
    👉 Subscribe to the channel and join us as we grow together in faith.
    📅 See you on the next Psalm upload.
    Welcome to the family. Welcome to the House of J&V.

    Second, expect more books from me as I sought God for a word for our relationship and live. But in the meantime, you can check my Amazon store to buy existing ebooks.

    Once, Happy New Year.

  • DAY 25 -🎄 Life in Him Is a Gift We Must Steward MATTHEW 25 (CHRISTMAS DAY)

    Merry Christmas!
    It’s no coincidence that today’s chapter. Matthew 25 is all about readiness, stewardship, compassion, and kingdom reward. Christ has come, and now He calls us to live as people who belong to Him.

    Yesterday in Matthew 24, we learned to stay watchful. Today, Matthew 25 shows us HOW:

    1. The Ten Virgins Spiritually Prepared

    “The bridegroom was a long time in coming… the wise took oil in jars.”  Matthew 25:4

    Life in Him requires spiritual oil consistent intimacy, prayer, Word, obedience.

    2. The Talents, Steward What God Gave You

    “Well done, good and faithful servant.” Matthew 25:21

    Christmas reminds us that God gave His Son.
    Our response is to give Him our gifts, time, grace, service, resources.

    3. The Sheep and Goats. Love Practically

    “I was hungry and you gave Me food… Whatever you did for the least of these, you did for Me.” Matthew 25:35,40

    Life in Him is visible in compassion.

    This links deeply with the entire journey from Day 1 until now:
    Life in Him is watching, waiting, loving, serving, and becoming like Christ.

    And today we celebrate His birth, the One who came so we can have LIFE in His name.

    CALL TO ACTION

    On this Christmas Day, choose one intentional act of love for someone who cannot repay you. Let Christ shine through you.

  • DAY 24 – Life in Him Stays Watchful and Faithful (MATTHEW 24)

    Yesterday exposed religious hypocrisy. Today in Matthew 24, Jesus shifts focus to the end times and our need for watchfulness.

    He speaks honestly about challenges:

    “Nation will rise against nation… and there will be famines and earthquakes.”  Matthew 24:7

    Life in Him is not escapism. It is readiness.

    He adds:

    “But the one who endures to the end will be saved.”  Matthew 24:13

    This links perfectly with Day 23: authentic faith must endure, not just appear strong.

    Jesus then teaches the parable of the fig tree and the faithful servant.

    You and I must remain awake, alert, faithful, and unshaken.

    Life in Him means living every day like He could return today.

    CALL TO ACTION

    Reflect on an area of your life where you’ve grown spiritually “sleepy.” Reignite it today; prayer, study, service, purity

  • 🌟 DAY 23 – Life in Him Rejects Hypocrisy (MATTHEW 23)

    From love being our kingdom culture, Matthew 23 exposes the opposite: hypocrisy.

    Jesus speaks directly firmly but lovingly to the religious elites:

    “Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites!”  Matthew 23:13

    He unveils the danger of outward spirituality without inward transformation.
    Life in Him is authenticity.
    It is integrity.
    It is allowing Christ to shape the inside first.

    He says:

    “You clean the outside of the cup… but inside they are full of greed and self-indulgence.”  Matthew 23:25

    This connects with Day 22: Love must begin in the heart, not surface.

    Jesus ends the chapter lamenting over Jerusalem:
    “How often I wanted to gather your children together… but you were not willing.”  Matthew 23:37

    Life in Him means yielding to His gathering embrace.

    CALL TO ACTION

    Ask God to expose any area where you appear spiritual outwardly but need healing inwardly. Pray for His cleansing

  • DAY 22 – Life in Him Prioritizes Love Above All (MATTHEW 22)

    From welcoming the King in Day 21, today Matthew 22 teaches us what the King truly values: LOVE.

    The Pharisees and Sadducees try to trap Jesus with theological questions, but He silences them with clarity and authority.

    When asked about the greatest commandment, He replies:

    “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart…
    And love your neighbour as yourself.”  Matthew 22:37–39

    This is the core of Life in Him:
    Not performance.
    Not religious debates.
    Not doctrinal gymnastics.

    LOVE.

    Love for God.
    Love for people.
    Love that transforms behaviour and motives.

    Jesus also shares the parable of the wedding banquet reminding us that God has invited everyone, but not everyone values the invitation. Life in Him requires honouring the call of God over complacency.

    This ties to Day 21: If Jesus is King, then love is our kingdom culture.

    CALL TO ACTION

    Today, intentionally show love: a message, a prayer, a gift, a forgiveness. Love is the proof of your walk with Him.

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