Category: COURTSHIP
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PRACTICAL WISDOM FOR SINGLE SISTERS WHO HATE FOOTBALL AND CANNOT TOLERATE IT.
I am a Chelsea fan and I don’t shy off saying that.
Recently I was on a thread with a sister who opined that it’s irresponsible husbands who go out to watch football at odd hours and she can’t share her husband with the beautiful game. If you are someone like her, here are practical wisdom for you:
- Marry someone who hates football as you do. There are a lot of single brothers who hate the game and don’t care a hoot about it.
It’s a sheer unwise decision to agree for a football fan and start troubling him for his hobby.
There are 168 hours in a week. 2 – 4 hours per week for his me-moments is not bad.
- Football is a team sport. You cannot play it individually nor can you enjoy watching it maximally as an individual. That’s why a football fan will prefer watching it in the stadium or at the viewing center sometimes at odd hours.
- Perhaps if you have to marry a football fan, marry either a Manchester City or Liverpool fan. How many are there in Nigeria that viewing center owner will be wasting resources to livestream their matches?
But Manchester United, Chelsea, and Arsenal fans, na you na no near dem ooooo.
Because I cannot just imagine me missing Chelsea vs Manchester United.
And
- If your husband rejects your food because his team loses, my dear, it’s because your food is not sweet. Men no dey reject sweet foods
Abi how will I reject jollof rice, fried rice, Amala, and Ewedu by Praise Foods because Chelsea loses?
Lastly, congratulations to Super Eagle of Nigeria.
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Holiness is Not Shabbiness: A Tale of Ade and Morayo
In the bustling city of Lagos, there lived a young woman named Morayo. Known for her grace and humility, Morayo was a beacon of modesty in a world often blinded by ostentation.
Ade, a close friend, observed Morayo’s distinctive approach to life. While many around them chased after the latest trends and flaunted their possessions, Morayo remained unswayed, radiating an inner elegance that surpassed the superficial.
Reflecting on Morayo’s character, Ade was reminded of a lesson ingrained in their Yoruba heritage—a lesson echoed in the teachings of modesty. In the heart of their vibrant community, the Yoruba people cherished values that celebrated humility and simplicity.
“Ẹ̀dá là ńlá”, Ade’s grandmother used to say, emphasizing that true greatness lies in character rather than external grandeur.
Ade saw the embodiment of this wisdom in Morayo, who, like a rare gem, shone brightest through her deeds and the kindness she shared. Inspired by Morayo’s example, Ade delved into the essence of modesty—a timeless virtue celebrated not just in Yoruba traditions but also echoed in the universal wisdom of scriptures.
Thus, the story of Ade and Morayo unfolds, a testament to the enduring beauty found in modesty, where names bear the weight of tradition, and character stands tall amidst the noise of a modern world.Decency and Modesty: Beyond Unkempt Appearances
In the pursuit of decency and modesty, it’s essential to dispel the misconception that one must look unkempt to embody these virtues. Modesty isn’t synonymous with neglect; rather, it’s a reflection of inner values that transcend external appearances.
Maintaining a well-groomed appearance doesn’t compromise one’s modesty. Personal hygiene, neatly kept attire, and a polished demeanor can coexist harmoniously with humility and simplicity. It’s about embracing a balanced approach that acknowledges the significance of self-care without succumbing to the allure of excess.
In fact, presenting oneself in a tidy manner can enhance the impact of modesty, demonstrating respect for oneself and others. It communicates a sense of responsibility and an understanding that the way we present ourselves matters. This nuanced perspective challenges the notion that modesty necessitates a disheveled look.
As we navigate the delicate balance between self-expression and humility, let’s remember that decency and modesty manifest in diverse forms. The key lies in cultivating an authentic and respectful demeanor that transcends outward appearances, affirming that looking decent and modest is an artistry that embraces both inner character and outward presentation.
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How to Honour And Respect Your Fiance.
Men irrespective of their age loved being honoured and respected but the problem is that some women don’t know how.
But to tell you the fact; what you are calling respect and honour in your own eyes, to him, is bullshit.
Now, see how
Happy watching.
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12 PERSONAL ADVICES I WILL GIVE YOU ABOUT COURTSHIP AND MARRIAGE (2).
7. AS A SINGLE LADY, YOUR FOOD, CLOTHES, EDUCATION, AND SHELTER ARE 100% THE JOB OF YOUR FATHER OR YOUR BROTHERS.
If your boyfriend wants to do this, all is well and good, but it’s not his job.
Also, if you can do that by yourself, you are just a normal human being. There’s nothing independent or strong about that.
8. DON’T PAY FOR LOVE. You are the most miserable of all men if you have to send data, call cards, or transport fare to chat, hear, or see your girlfriend.
The one beyond redemption is placing your girl on salary. Salary for loving you or what?
9. LOVE IS ENOUGH TO SUSTAIN A HAPPY HOME BUT DON’T MARRY BECAUSE OF LOVE.
The problem with most of us concerning love is that we know it as noun rathe than, verb.
Go check 2 Corinthians 13 and see the attributes of love but still don’t because you love him or her.
Marry because your core values and beliefs are agreed or aligned.
You will save yourself a lot of headaches in marriage with that.
10. MARRIAGE NEEDS A LOT OF MONEY TO RUN. Love is good but in the presence of plenty of money, love is sweeter.
Therefore before you get married, it’s not only enough for both of you to have what brings in money but one of you should have a reliable and consistent money flow (preferably the husband).
11. FOR A YOUNG COUPLE, A SELF-CONTAINED APARTMENT – A ROOM, PARLOR, KITCHEN, AND BATHROOM IS ENOUGH TO START A LIFE.
One, it helps to create the necessary bonding needed at the start of marriage since there is no space for extended me-moments.
I don’t advise, a 3-, 4- bedroom flat for young couples. Trust me, you don’t need it.
12. MARRIAGE IS SWEET. Make sure you do it.Bonus
12. IF YOU CAN’T COPE WITH A PARTICULAR BEHAVIOR OF YOUR PARTNER IN COURTSHIP, make sure he/she drops it now or you find your square root. One thing about marriage is that it amplifies everything, both the good, the bad, and the ugly.
12. THEY WON’T TREAT YOU BETTER THAN THEY TREAT THEIR MOTHER, SISTER, FEMALE FRIEND, BOSS, BROTHER, OR THOSE BELOW THEM.Thank for reading sharing and commenting.
I love you.
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12 PERSONAL ADVICE I WILL GIVE ON COURTSHIP AND MARRIAGE.
I deliberately called them personal because that is what I am going to tell you if you seek my opinions on them and I understand that it may not work for everyone but I am 100% sure that it doesn’t.
1. MARRY AT YOUR YOUTHFUL AGE. I mean in your late 20s or very early 30s.
I know there is no latecomer but still, having your firstborn in primary 5 at 70 is not ideal.
Two, the older you grow the riskier the childbearing. Men, don’t let anyone deceive you, sperm quality decreases with increasing age. Though you have been told you can impregnate women at 90 how many grandpas have you heard impregnate women at such old age?
Three, sex is best enjoyed as a youth. Maybe that was why the Bible always says, ‘Enjoy the wife of thy youth.’
If you are very rich, ignore this advice you can do surrogacy, or IVF, etc, and the like. Also if you don’t plan on becoming a family, as in all what you want is a childless happy marriage, you can marry any time.
2. SHORT COURTSHIP IS OKAY. After you have seen someone to do life with, I will recommend courtship of 1 year at minimum and 2 years at the maximum unless you want to take a step of faith like me but I don’t recommend it anyhow.
One, the shorter, the merrier. Too long a courtship can lead to boredom and boringness in the relationship and later in marriage.
Two, we dated for 8 years is not a testimony. For I know, you could have dated for 1 or 2 years and go on to enjoy 7 or 6 years of blissful Marriage.
Three, one of the best ways to prevent premarital sex is a short courtship.
3. LOOK FOR SOMEONE DURING YOUR UNIVERSITY DAY OR NYSC.
I don’t recommend romantic relationships for 100-level students but I will usually tell them that before they graduate, to make sure that they are in a ‘serious’ relationship. If that wasn’t possible, catch one during your NYSC.
You know what, the older you get, the lesser the dating pool and harder is for you even though the quality increases.
4. MARRY WITHIN YOUR CIRCLE – both your tribal, spiritual, and denominational circles if possible.
I have nothing against intertribal, or interdenominational marriage but I still prefer Marriage between two people from identical tribal, spiritual, and denominational cultures.
This doesn’t mean if my son brings a Fulani girl from the winners I will object, but I will want him to choose from among Yoruba and from fellow Baptists.
Why, I felt that the time I would be using to explain my culture, ways of life, language, this and that to my wife and hers to me, could be better used in other equally profitable things.
As per interfaith, that one is a BIG NO for me. Christian should go for Christian. Muslim for Muslim. That doesn’t mean we are enemies.
Why? Our spiritual values don’t align.
5. AS A GUY, DON’T EVER DATE, ‘on this day, a king is born,’ AND MORE LADIES TALK LESS OF MARRIAGE.
Run very far from a lady who thinks theirs is to collect from a man and never to give a man.
If you do, you have likely shortened your lifespan by half with a severely entitled being.
6. AS A SINGLE LADY, YOUR FOOD, CLOTHES, EDUCATION, AND SHELTER ARE 100% THE JOB OF YOUR FATHER OR YOUR BROTHERS.
If your boyfriend wants to do this, all is well and good, but it’s not his job.
Also, if you can do that by yourself, you are just a normal human being. There’s nothing independent or strong about that.See you tomorrow but before then say something about this post.
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ARE YOU ABOUT TO GET MARRIED? THEN YOU MUST READ THIS.
This post is more to the about-to-wed guys than ladies.
In the olden YORUBA setting, Young Couples are not allowed to work for some months.
In fact, as a son they married for you or give you out in marriage (this is not forced marriage. There is no point in history when Yoruba do that), hence the word igbeyawo f’ọmọ (for groom’s family) or ifọmọfọkọ (for In bride’s family)
And your father should be the one that pays your wife’s bride price.
They make sure you have your abode and field to till at the point of marriage in a bid to ensure your marital life was started on some level of comfortability
This is where I am going; as much as starting with what you have in marriage is good, and highly recommended by me, knowing that I too, didn’t ever have ‘anything’ when Iya Kyle-XY decided to do this life with me, but please don’t start your family life with avoidable stresses and glaring lackness.
I know you have read about couples who started their marital journey in an uncompleted building and are now mansion owners – I am not doubting their zero beginning but I would prefer you start your own on at least a room with a comfortable bed that fits two people.
I knew you knew how your parents started their marriage with no shishi and hunger but now plenty money dey. All is well and good, but I will still advise you to start yours with food in your tummy and foodstuffs in your panties. Not necessarily a sumptuous meal but something good to hold belly every day.
You might have heard how your pastor and his wife have one clothes each at the point of marriage but now they can cloth 1000 people. Thank God for their lives but I will still say please for God’s sake, start yours with a few clean, wearable clothes.
All that I am saying is that start your family on a comfortable level – even if it is the barest comfort level.
Do you know why? It is easy to think and think adequately when the necessities of life are not a major problem again.
Two, marriage is already very hard work than adding the agony of lack, hunger, and nakedness to it at the very start of it. Each with those that started on a very opulent level, it is a serious work talk less of those who are finding it excruciatingly difficult. Please, as much as possible, destress your marriage.
And lastly, I know testimonies abound of those who began from ground zero and are now heroes and heroines but testimonies abound also of people who started from level 1, 2, or,3 and grew massively to level 100. Won’t you rather go with the former?
By this, I hope you know I am not saying go and borrow money to rent a house you won’t be able to pay the rent the following year, order your daily food from hold a Hilda Baci to pepper your ex and online in-laws or be decked in debt-gotten Gucci. All I want to say is get a comfortable cheaper liveable place, a few pairs of nice clothes, and a least when you are not fasting food to hold your spirit body, and mind together and don’t forget to order food from Praise Foods occasionally to spice up your marriage at a very shikini money.
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Differences are guaranteed parts of Marriage (2)
I remembered my wife saying she doesn’t buy eggs to keep because of me, I replied, ‘you are a daughter of government worker so you are raised on budgets and I am a son of a bricklayer, I was purely raised on faith that we can’t go hungry (and sure we didn’t).This is just one of many differences between us and it wasn’t because any one of us what faulty or bad. It was because we grew up under different parents, environments, schools, read different books, and expose to different things.
If we didn’t settle with this differences, one may be seeing the other as waster and the other seeing the one as miser. We just accepted the difference and make adjustments as we continued on this journey.And I am very happy to tell you that you are different from your charming Prince and that different is make will marry your home, a habitation of peace.
Thanks. Make sure you share, like and comment
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How To Know if He loves you.
The attached picture is a comment and my reply to a post of mine.
I had a friend who is a passionate fan of Yinka Ayefele. He had all his albums.
There is a brother I know to whom Tope Alabi and Sola Allyson can’t do any wrong. He is always under every post defending the former.
, I am a very huge fan of the late reply Bàbá Ara. Bàbá O ṣe anu Rẹ duro by him was my most streamed song of the year on Boom Play. Even the purported cocaine smuggling has nothing on me.
Same thing for Hillsong United.
This brings us to the point, someone who loves you will be partially blind to your faults and weaknesses.
Such an individual is not on fault-hunting about you.
Did they know you are faulty? Of course, they knew.
But ẹni teyán bá fẹ kí learn kankan (the one someone loves is disease-free). You are not getting married to find out the weakness of your spouse (Watchman Nee)
Therefore if he/she always finds fault in everything about you, such an individual is not yours.
May God give you discernment in Jesus’ name.Share this:
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Change your view
Some of you have seen dysfunctionalinaties to the extent that every things good in marriage is slavery.
A married woman cooking for her husband is slavery.
Pregnancy is not fair on women.
Men don’t do anything in marriage.
And all other trashy talks from you.
See, I have nothing to say to you than to tell you that God will heal your hurting heart in Jesus name.Share this:
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Make Your Marriage Beautiful by Doing This.
Many singles think Marriage conveys some sort of special power on the Married or they aren’t ordinary.
Gosh, my dear! We are ordinary folk like you. Not superhumans. No superpower.
On a normal day, my alarm goes on by 5am, my wife have probably wake up early.
By 6am, after I am done with my morning devotions, we will come out for Family devotions and say our good mornings. By this time, my wife has put food on the gas.
While food is still on fire, I will go for my bath with hot water. After that, I will carry Kyle-XY, while his mum had her bath then he will have his own bath playfully.
None of these were done by superhuman power. It’s just what everyday folk does.
By 7am with our breakfasts already packed, we are out hustling for our daily bread. At times, during the day, we contact ourselves. Most times, we don’t.
Furthermore, most evenings find us in church for one program or the others and we retired home by 7pm, sharing how our days met. Wife went to fix something for dinner while I play with Kyle-XY.
After dinner, we gist about many things, had family devotions, if we didn’t have one in the morning.
Then off to bed; at times, one to press his/her phone, other to read or relax. If there is power availability during the night, the first to wake, charge all rechargeables in the house.
The next day, we rinse and repeat.
Now, what make our marriage beautiful is staying true to our marital vows through the normal days and very abnormal ones, finding delight and positivity in one’s partner.
What make us say we are enjoying this time is both spontaneous and inspontaneous moments, the love, and the respect, the shoulder to lean on, the kids to raise, etc.
Apart from those things as highlighted about, marriage is pretty boring, if you are not a happy person in yourself.
Lastly, we, the married are regular folks like you and who even told you you need superpower to build a home?
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Why I married my wife despite loving my ex than her.
Good day. How has it been so far?
Today, I want to talk about something very important about choosing who to marry.
A little story before I delve into the topic at hand. You see, I love Pelumi, my ex, than my wife till now but if I am given the chance to choose between the love of my life and the woman I married again, I will gladly choose the wife over and over again. 1 million times sef gan.
Now, you must have heard Marriage Counselors opined that love can’t sustain marital journey. I perfectly understand the angle they are coming from but I beg to differ by saying; Love is more than enough to sustain a happy marriage.
I repeat, love is the principal ingredient for a happy marriage.
If you love someone, as a husband, you will provide and protect your wife and children.
If you love your husband, you will truly be a help that meet his needs, vision and purpose.
Furthermore, look at the attributes of love in 1 Corinthians Chapter 13 and tell me how, where all those attributes are evidently present, will be unhappy?
But I am begging you today, don’t marry that person simply because you love him/her, MARRY THAT PERSON BECAUSE YOUR CORE VALUES ALIGNED. That was the reason why I dumped her. dumped her and marry my wife.
If you don’t like to use majority of your marital life fighting one avoidable battle to another and frustrated, marry someone whose core values agreed, aligned, and work with yours especially in this four areas;
- Religion beliefs and Doctrine.
- Use of money
- Parenting styles and
- In-laws relationships
Trust me, you don’t want to use your marital life explaining why congregational worship is important to a believer to someone who seem church as a scam or a thing of the heart.
I repeat myself, it won’t be funny again if your spouse is tightfisted or spendthrift.
You don’t want to use productive days of life arguing and settling issues arising from misalignment of core values, purposes and visions.
Can two people walk together except they agreed?
You know why I am suggesting you choose value alignment over love is because one, you are expected to love all manners of people as mandated by the Bible and two it’s one of the reasons God categorically forbids marriage between believers and unbelievers because He knows you can possibly fall in love with them but your values don’t align, can agree, or worked together.
Another reason is that God wants you, a happy home and happy home will be unachievable in an environment of constant conflicts, disagreement and misunderstanding
In the intricate dance of relationships, the choice of a life partner is a profound decision that shapes the chapters of our shared story. While love is undeniably a powerful force, it is values alignment that serves as the compass guiding this journey. Choosing a partner whose values resonate with your own creates a foundation of shared beliefs, fostering understanding, and fortifying the union against the winds of change. Love may be the melody, but values alignment is the harmonious rhythm that sustains the beautiful symphony of a lifelong partnership. So, as you embark on the path of choosing a life companion, let the echoes of shared values be the enduring melody that weaves through the tapestry of your love story.
Lastly, Embrace lasting love by choosing values alignment. Share your thoughts, like, subscribe, and comment for a community of shared wisdom.
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