This post is more to the about-to-wed guys than ladies.
In the olden YORUBA setting, Young Couples are not allowed to work for some months.
In fact, as a son they married for you or give you out in marriage (this is not forced marriage. There is no point in history when Yoruba do that), hence the word igbeyawo f’ọmọ (for groom’s family) or ifọmọfọkọ (for In bride’s family)
And your father should be the one that pays your wife’s bride price.
They make sure you have your abode and field to till at the point of marriage in a bid to ensure your marital life was started on some level of comfortability
This is where I am going; as much as starting with what you have in marriage is good, and highly recommended by me, knowing that I too, didn’t ever have ‘anything’ when Iya Kyle-XY decided to do this life with me, but please don’t start your family life with avoidable stresses and glaring lackness.
I know you have read about couples who started their marital journey in an uncompleted building and are now mansion owners – I am not doubting their zero beginning but I would prefer you start your own on at least a room with a comfortable bed that fits two people.
I knew you knew how your parents started their marriage with no shishi and hunger but now plenty money dey. All is well and good, but I will still advise you to start yours with food in your tummy and foodstuffs in your panties. Not necessarily a sumptuous meal but something good to hold belly every day.
You might have heard how your pastor and his wife have one clothes each at the point of marriage but now they can cloth 1000 people. Thank God for their lives but I will still say please for God’s sake, start yours with a few clean, wearable clothes.
All that I am saying is that start your family on a comfortable level – even if it is the barest comfort level.
Do you know why? It is easy to think and think adequately when the necessities of life are not a major problem again.
Two, marriage is already very hard work than adding the agony of lack, hunger, and nakedness to it at the very start of it. Each with those that started on a very opulent level, it is a serious work talk less of those who are finding it excruciatingly difficult. Please, as much as possible, destress your marriage.
And lastly, I know testimonies abound of those who began from ground zero and are now heroes and heroines but testimonies abound also of people who started from level 1, 2, or,3 and grew massively to level 100. Won’t you rather go with the former?
By this, I hope you know I am not saying go and borrow money to rent a house you won’t be able to pay the rent the following year, order your daily food from hold a Hilda Baci to pepper your ex and online in-laws or be decked in debt-gotten Gucci. All I want to say is get a comfortable cheaper liveable place, a few pairs of nice clothes, and a least when you are not fasting food to hold your spirit body, and mind together and don’t forget to order food from Praise Foods occasionally to spice up your marriage at a very shikini money.
Thank you for understanding this post.
Courtship Forum 