I deliberately called them personal because that is what I am going to tell you if you seek my opinions on them and I understand that it may not work for everyone but I am 100% sure that it doesn’t.
1. MARRY AT YOUR YOUTHFUL AGE. I mean in your late 20s or very early 30s.
I know there is no latecomer but still, having your firstborn in primary 5 at 70 is not ideal.
Two, the older you grow the riskier the childbearing. Men, don’t let anyone deceive you, sperm quality decreases with increasing age. Though you have been told you can impregnate women at 90 how many grandpas have you heard impregnate women at such old age?
Three, sex is best enjoyed as a youth. Maybe that was why the Bible always says, ‘Enjoy the wife of thy youth.’
If you are very rich, ignore this advice you can do surrogacy, or IVF, etc, and the like. Also if you don’t plan on becoming a family, as in all what you want is a childless happy marriage, you can marry any time.
2. SHORT COURTSHIP IS OKAY. After you have seen someone to do life with, I will recommend courtship of 1 year at minimum and 2 years at the maximum unless you want to take a step of faith like me but I don’t recommend it anyhow.
One, the shorter, the merrier. Too long a courtship can lead to boredom and boringness in the relationship and later in marriage.
Two, we dated for 8 years is not a testimony. For I know, you could have dated for 1 or 2 years and go on to enjoy 7 or 6 years of blissful Marriage.
Three, one of the best ways to prevent premarital sex is a short courtship.
3. LOOK FOR SOMEONE DURING YOUR UNIVERSITY DAY OR NYSC.
I don’t recommend romantic relationships for 100-level students but I will usually tell them that before they graduate, to make sure that they are in a ‘serious’ relationship. If that wasn’t possible, catch one during your NYSC.
You know what, the older you get, the lesser the dating pool and harder is for you even though the quality increases.
4. MARRY WITHIN YOUR CIRCLE – both your tribal, spiritual, and denominational circles if possible.
I have nothing against intertribal, or interdenominational marriage but I still prefer Marriage between two people from identical tribal, spiritual, and denominational cultures.
This doesn’t mean if my son brings a Fulani girl from the winners I will object, but I will want him to choose from among Yoruba and from fellow Baptists.
Why, I felt that the time I would be using to explain my culture, ways of life, language, this and that to my wife and hers to me, could be better used in other equally profitable things.
As per interfaith, that one is a BIG NO for me. Christian should go for Christian. Muslim for Muslim. That doesn’t mean we are enemies.
Why? Our spiritual values don’t align.
5. AS A GUY, DON’T EVER DATE, ‘on this day, a king is born,’ AND MORE LADIES TALK LESS OF MARRIAGE.
Run very far from a lady who thinks theirs is to collect from a man and never to give a man.
If you do, you have likely shortened your lifespan by half with a severely entitled being.
6. AS A SINGLE LADY, YOUR FOOD, CLOTHES, EDUCATION, AND SHELTER ARE 100% THE JOB OF YOUR FATHER OR YOUR BROTHERS.
If your boyfriend wants to do this, all is well and good, but it’s not his job.
Also, if you can do that by yourself, you are just a normal human being. There’s nothing independent or strong about that.
See you tomorrow but before then say something about this post.
Courtship Forum 