Most States in Nigeria resumed academic work for Primary and Secondary Schools today, kick-starting the last lap of the 2024/25 academic session.
This term is crucial because out of many things, this is the term will highest numbers of holidays, end of the session party, and the determinant of whether a student will move from the present class to the next higher one.
With that in mind, I am enjoying all dear parents being supportive as always, not slothful in providing for your wards’ academic welfare
Also not to make them angry so that they will not be psychologically disturbed.
Lastly, I pray the kids are protected in Jesus’ name.
No evils will befall them in Jesus name and knowledge, wisdom and understanding will be their portion in Jesus’ name.
In the bustling city of Aba, Nigeria, where tradition intertwines with modernity, lived a couple whose marriage was a testament to the intricate dance of differences. Adewuyi and Modupeoluwa, both Nigerians, embarked on a journey that unveiled the beauty and challenges woven into the fabric of their union.
Adewuyi, a free-spirited artist, saw the world as a canvas waiting to be painted with vibrant hues of spontaneity. Modupeoluwa, on the other hand, was a disciplined banker who believed in the order and precision of black and white. Their personalities, seemingly worlds apart, converged in the tapestry of matrimony, creating a rich mosaic of love and understanding.
Early in their marriage, his spontaneity clashed with her need for structure. Simple decisions, like weekend plans or household routines, became potential sources of tension. However, rather than letting these disparities tear them apart, they chose to navigate the labyrinth of their differences.
One pivotal moment occurred when Modupeoluwa’s meticulous planning collided with his impromptu desire to host a gathering of friends at their home. As the clash of expectations unfolded, it became a turning point in their understanding of one another. They decided to communicate openly, delving into the root of their perspectives.
Through heartfelt conversations, he explained how spontaneity fueled his creativity, providing an escape from the constraints of routine. She, in turn, expressed how structure provided stability and a sense of security. Slowly, they began to appreciate the unique strengths each brought to the relationship.
Their journey mirrored the broader marital context, where diverse backgrounds, systems, and beliefs coexist. The couple discovered that their dissimilarities mirrored the rich cultural diversity that makes Marriage unique. Embracing these distinctions became a celebration of their heritage and a source of strength in their marriage.
Over time, the husband and the wife discovered the beauty of compromise. They learned to find a middle ground that allowed both spontaneity and structure to coexist harmoniously. Weekends became a blend of impromptu adventures and planned quiet moments. Their home transformed into a gallery of Adewuyi’s creations adorned with the order that Modupeoluwa cherished.
The couple’s story became an inspiration to their friends and family, challenging the conventional notion that opposites repel. Instead, Adewuyi and Modupeoluwa showcased how differences, when embraced with love and understanding, could be the foundation of a resilient and thriving marriage.
In the heart of Aba, Adewuyi and Modupeoluwa’s love story became a beacon, reminding everyone that differences are not obstacles but opportunities for growth. As they continued to navigate the ebb and flow of life together, their union became a living testament to the idea that a marriage enriched by diverse perspectives is not only possible but profoundly beautiful.
By tribe, I am a Yoruba from Southwest Nigeria. We are one of the major tribes in Nigeria.
The first culture heritage I am always most proud of is the our culture of Respect and Greetings.
In my culture, young ones don’t called or refer to elderly ones by names. You must affixed the name of the elderly person with appropriate titles like Baba (Daddy), Mama (mum), Auntie so so so and so (if you see most Yoruba referring to someone as their auntie, most times such person is their sibling sister😄😄), broda lagbaja, oba (king) etc.
And we used plural pronoun to refer to eldery person. Instead of o, we used e or won.
In addition, we believe everyone deserves respect – the young and the old, that’s why, we have a proverb that says, ‘òwò díèdíè lará ñfè (everyone deserves little respect) but some people deserve perpetual Respect notably your parents and your king.
Furthermore, we, the boys greet by prostrating and our girls do so by kneeling. Yoruba greatly tied greeting to respect.
Girl kneeling and the boy prostrating for their mother
We also have greetings for everything. For example, when Nigerian government removed subsidy, we started greeting ourselves, e ku aisi subsidy yii, meaning congratulations on this no subsidy regime ooo 😁😄😅
The second cultural heritage I am most proud of is our food specifically Amala and Gbegiri plus ewedu. You can’t beat the flavour.
If you need one made for you, DM +2347032338012.
Lastly, take the mic and tell us what aspects of your cultural heritage are you most proud of or interested in?
As the world marks the passing away of Queen Elizabeth II of England after reigning for 70 years aged 96 and welcome his son, King Charles III, I will like to remind your how Britain and the Queen encouraged the slavery of Africans. How they kidnapped them and transported them to their plantations and how they moved from house to house burning and raping and enslaving.
Need I remind you that I will also tell you how the British started slavery, underdeveloped Nigeria and ignited civil war in the country.
If you are interested in reading all these and more, you will be tired of waiting because I won’t tell you lies.
The truth is when the Whites arrived on our soil, they didn’t go hinterland to capture slaves rather it was our forefathers who went around capturing their brothers, sisters, sons, daughters and relatives and selling them to the white merchants.
For what? For mirrors, salts, combs and many worthless items.
So, let’s blame our forefathers before blaming somebody’s forefathers for atrocities and acts of betrayals committed against kindred.
Let’s cancel our forefathers and foremothers for being greedy and callous and let call them out for conniving with outside enemies against kiths and kins.
Two, slavery in Africa did not start with the arrival of the oyinbos, Africans have been enslaving one another, long before their arrival.
Does it means since they didn’t start it, they are absolve of all crimes? No but let’s deal with ourselves first before dealing with one. Yoruba will say, ‘e jékí álé eléyóró, kátó fàbò fún adíe,‘ meaning let’s deal with lice first before we come and address the bird.
Furthermore, some Nigerians are accusing the dead Queen of causing the Biafran war and underdevelopment in the country. For Pete sake! The Nigerian civil war called Biafran war was precipitated by January 15 bloody coup.
Did English benefited from it? Yes, through weapons selling. Not just only Britain, but also France, USA and many big economics. Who should we now blame? Must we blamed anybody? If you must blamed then we should blame our greedy leaders for senseless war(s) and let me tell you that the longest war in the world was Kiriji war which lasted for 16 years among the Yoruba people of South western Nigeria. Was the imperial family and her government also responsible for that?
Moreover, about underdevelopment, why do you like to play victim’s card? For crying out loud, Nigeria is not the only country that was colonised. USA, Israel, India, South Africa, Singapore, UAE and many other developed countries are former British colonies. Therefore the story don’t gel at all.
What should now do? Let’s deal with the log in our eyes before asking about the speck in neighbor’s eyes and let’s roll over our sleeves for true Nigerian project.
Caveat; this is a long but beneficial article and two, I am speaking from a Yoruba-Christian perspective which can be fixed in many African cultures. This write-up explains Everything you need to know about getting married in Nigeria.
Let’s start like this, in Africa, a wedding especially is such a big ceremony that involves extended family, money, food, colour codes, culture, music and many more. A wedding is a big ceremony for us.
I could vividly remember my own some months ago with nods of divine appreciation.
Therefore, in this writeup, I will be talking about the following:
What is the wedding?
When should wedding preps start?
Steps/types of weddings in Nigeria
How to have a budget-friendly wedding ceremony in Nigeria? 🇳🇬
Dos and Donts of the wedding ceremony.
What is a Wedding?
Firstly, what is a wedding? A wedding is a formal ceremony to legalise and solemnise a marriage.
It is also an event marking the end of courtship and the start of the marriage.
I want you to note the keywords in both definitions; ceremony and event which can be big, medium or large depending on your pocket, taste and wants. Therefore, don’t expect profit from it. It is not an investment plan.
In addition, I want you to know that the bigness or the smallness of your wedding ceremony has nothing to do with the sweetness, blissfulness and enjoyment of your marriage. You can have it either way and enjoy or endure your conjugal union.
My parents have theirs in my maternal grandfather’s sitting room and 39 God-graced years already down.
When should wedding preps start?
Wedding preps should begin and it usually begins in Nigeria when these two conditions have been met:
When the intending couples decided to take their relationship to the next deep level called marriage.
And two, when all consents have been secured and guaranteed. The parental consents and couples-to-be’ consents.
And I will always advise you to calm down with wedding prep with someone your parents have not agreed with or someone who seems reluctant to the whole idea of marrying you.
You see I didn’t mention when he/she proposes. Why? Because I don’t see any sense in asking your fiance/fiancee of more than 2-3 years if she will marry you after sharing your dreams, and goals, and being introduced to friends and family as lovers. What is the purpose of courtship and dating if not marriage?
Perhaps, you guys have been courting and dating wrongly. That is why I write a book titled A Tearless Courtship – a simpler guide to Christian courtship and dating. Download by clicking here.
Picking a wedding date?
Going by the many steps toward marriage in Nigerian wedding ceremonies, different people determine dates viz:
The bride-to-be’s parents usually pick the introduction Date. Sometimes, the husband-to-be’s parents might
The Registrar chooses the one for the registry.
The engagement date is strictly the bride-to-be’s parents’ call
While the couples-to-be most times determine when they will be wedded at church.
As far as weddings in most Nigerian cultures are concerned, the groom’s family has less to do in the determination of many things.
Steps in the wedding ceremony.
Majorly, there are three to four steps in a wedding that will lead to legal Marriage in Nigeria. All the steps are explained below:
Introduction
This is the first step in the wedding ceremony and it is an avenue for both families to know themselves. My dear, this is strictly nuclear family affairs which concern only important members of both families notably parents, siblings and who both families considered important in their respective families.
and the main event of the day is each knowing one another; more like each family saying officially we know our children are dating/courting, we agreed to their relationship and look forward to them being husband and wife in the nearest possible future.
Furthermore, among other things done on that day is the collection of the bride price list by the groom’s family and sometimes, the setting of the D-Day.
It may also interest you to know that introduction is strictly at the bride’s parents’ house and not vice versa and if you are the groom, make sure your family visit with a basket of fruits/gift and if you are the bride, make sure your family entertains your future husband family.
A typical introduction package from groom’s family.
Less I forget, exchange of rings by couples are also done here too.
Dear Christians, please even if you have all the money to spend, you still don’t need a tent, cake, drum or hall for the introduction. 8 – 10 people from both sides are enough and the bride’s parents’ sitting room is beautiful enough.
Apart from what you guys will wear, you don’t need to borrow to fund it.
Registry
The second step to a successful wedding day is Filling of wedding notification at your Local Government Area Secretariat.
This is usually done after determination of wedding date.
At the registry, the registrar will ask for two passports each of intending couples and a joint photography of them to be pasted on the LGA notice board for 21 days.
But before that you will be asked to pay certain amount of fee – a very small amount of money into different accounts usually 3 bank accounts.
After the payment of required fee and if there is no objections to your intention within that 21 days that your names are on the bann, the registrar gives you the date to come for your joining and vow taking. Shikena! Lobatan!!
Guys, two secrets here; number one, you don’t need to go to any Federal Registry to have your wedding. All weddings conducted at every LGA in Nigeria is valid and legal as confirmed by Supreme Court last year. Asejuni Ikoyi Registry, your LGA is okay.
Secondly, on that day, you don’t have to panic. Basically what you do in front of the registrar is him/her highlighting and telling you those you can’t marry under the law and the consequences of breaking such laws and where are you having your white wedding, peradventure you are going plus saying your vows. If your answer is in affirmative, as per who can’t marry, you take you vow by placing your hands on the Bible and munching some word after the registrar, kisses the Bible and sign your marriage certificate then boooooom you are legally married under Nigeria Marriage Act. 😍😍😍
This is perhaps the cheapest type or step of wedding in terms of cost and time. If you guys are still going to church, 4 person is enough – your LOML and you plus two friends preferably best man and chief bridesmaid plus you don’t need new clothes for this and if yours is stoping here, only 4 people is actually needed to sign the certificate, so you still don’t need crowd. Why crowding when hardly will you guys used up to 30 minutes?
Engagement/Traditional wedding.
This part is the most important step of wedding ceremony. This is part where you marry your wife according to the culture, traditions and practices of your soon-to-be wife.
Groom and his friends prostrating for the bride’s family.
Traditional wedding is more of larger introduction ceremony; now, all your extended family can and should attend this one and two, payment of bride price and dowry as the case may be.
This is a very colourful and entertaining event reverend highly among the Yoruba because it is a day of heartfelt prayers, asoebi, dance, money spraying and a sort of family reunion.
It is usually anchored by two MCs namely Alagaijoko (sitting MC) representing the bride’s family and Alagaiduro (standing MC) who is representing the groom’s family.
I will also sound a note of warning here; as a Christian I will advise you to engage the service of professional Christian engagers. These ones will not waste your time and money and make your joyous day, a day for the Lord. With secular engagers out there, it is cold outside.
Part of the activities for that day (in no particular order) include:
Introduction of both family collectively especially the parents of the couples.
Prostration of the groom for the bride’s family indicating that please accept me as your biological son and give me your daughter I will take care of her.❤️😄😍
Prostration of groom’s friends for the bride’s family signifying that please give our friend your daughter, he will take care of her. 😍
Kneeling down by bride for the groom’s family indicating that “accept me as your biological daughter.”
Kneeling down of bride’s friends.
Prayer by both families for their newly acquired children.
Payment of bride price by the groom’s family meaning, “take this token in appreciation of taking care of our daughter who has been with you all these while” and collection of such by bride’s family.
Greetings from both families.
Reading of proposal and acceptance letter by someone from bride’s family.
Cutting of cake and Exchange of rings
Husband giving her wife, the first feeding fee. 😍😄😁😃😁. LoL! I gave my wife 500 naira.
Etc
This is also done exclusively at bride’s place and basically traditional wedding is technically merging the two family to be one
As per entertaining attendees, it depends on your pocket, the norm now is to share puff puff or jollof rice in a take-away manners.
If you successfully do this, congratulations you are now married. In fact no religious houses will solemnize your marriage with payment of bride price in Nigeria.
White wedding
This is the last step in being legally married in Nigeria and must be conducted within 3 months of filling your marriage notification at your LGA. It is called white wedding because the bride always wear white wedding gown which signifies purity in the day of yore but I think proper name this day should be church wedding and two it is not compulsory to wear white colour as a bride if you don’t have the financial power to get one and purity is more than than colour.
I knew of a wedding conducted more than four decades ago with traditional clothes for both groom and the bride. Also recently a couples went viral on FacebookNG for rocking traditional igbo clothes for their church wedding.
Basically, what you do here is solemnization of your wedding before God, His angels and His people – the church by promising to take care and love your spouse in all circumstances.
This is perhaps the most expensive part of a normal wedding in the country but the main thing is never borrow to fund a wedding ceremony.
If I may shock you, apart from the couples and their helps (best man and chief bridesmaid), only six other person are needed – 3 each from both sides to sign the certificate.
Now, before I closed this part, I wish to inform you to ignore naysayers who is saying that weddings conducted in churches are illegal. They are liars. Weddings conducted in a licensed churches by a licensed minister are perfectly legal. Infact you will be given two copies of marriage certificate bearing the seal of the Federal Republic of Nigeria – one for you and one for filling at your Local Government Area Secretariat and a scratch card for e-registration of your marriage on government website.
Reception.
I am just including this part as a formality not that it conveys any legal entity on the marriage. It is just an avenue to entertain friends and family.
If you are a mid-income earner, allow your parents to finance the budget of this part because they will surely have more guests than even both of you will do. Infact times three of yours especially your moms 😍😁😁😄.
Dos and Don’ts of Wedding.
1. Do not borrow to fund your weeding. It is gross irresponsibility to do. It is wise and advisable to start your family debt-free.
2. Stay by your budget and if anybody ask for the wedding of his dream, tell the person to finance it for you.
3. For you, the intending husband, make sure you get the bride price list on time and start getting imperishable items.
4. For your traditional wedding, employ Christian engagers that will not waste your time and resources.
5. If you will go to church (some will not go to church but end it at registry after the payment of bride price), please tell the officiants about the plan for a simple, debt-free, glorious wedding plans. Most of these pastors want to help but we hid a lot from them.
6. Except for little bride and groom, usee matured grown-up adults for your bridal train. It will save you from thousands of post-wedding apologies and remove stress from your preps.
7. For your little bride and groom, make sure you collect your money from their parents before buying their clothing materials. After party, shingbai you no go see collect.
8. Make sure you are in great physical and mental conditions during your wedding preps. That period is not the period for extended fasting and rigorous spiritual activities.
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I am dedicating this article to her and others who lost their lives in tragic incident.
But nevertheless, I have this say; Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior because Nigeria will overcome. Habakkuk 3:17-18 NIV
Welcome once again to this channel. It has been fantastic 20 days all along.
To start with, I am a Nigerian 🇳🇬🇳🇬. A proud one at that and I love my country for the following reasons:
Multi-pluralities: both in tribes (over 200), languages (over 250), religions (more than 5), political parties (close to 100 in the last general elections),etc.
Famous personalities who are shaking the whole world in all human endeavors. Name that sector and you will definitely met a Nigerian in the top seat there.
Highest numbers of twins in the whole world
And many more.
In traditional Yoruba agbada.
Therefore, I thank God for the provision of all these in my country.
Semo and okro soup
I also thank God for our leaders across all strata for the wisdom and understanding you have given them and will give them.
I also appreciate your Holy name for our economy. You are wonderful oh Lord, my God.
For adding to us daily making us the most populous Black nation, you are highly exalted
Thank you for everything concerning my country. It is by your power and allowance, that we are, despite the threats of terrorists, seccessionists, bandits, insecurities, etc.
Conclusively, let’s sing the national anthem;
Arise, O Compatriots Nigeria’s call obey To serve our fatherland With love and strength and faith The labour of our heroes past, shall never be in vain To serve with heart and might, One nation bound in freedom, peace and unity
Oh God of creation, Direct our noble cause Guide our leaders right Help our youth the truth to know In love and honesty to grow And living just and true Great lofty heights attain To build a nation where peace and justice shall reign
Today’s task for you: (1) How many state of the federation have you been to? (For Nigerians). (2) Have you been to Nigeria? If yes, which state? (non-Nigerians).
P:S: To non-Nigerians wondering if these assertions are true. They are true and Nigeria is not as bad as it’s portrays home and abroad and we have our own national challenges as every developing and developed nations.
In the midst of appreciating God for all His wondrous works, I decided to teach you how to make Ekuru.
Actually, Ekuru (a Nigerian food common with the Yoruba) is made with beans and followed the same steps as moin moin making but with a slight difference.
The steps to be followed in making Ekuru are highlighted in this video. Watch, like, subscribe and comment https://youtu.be/mgt2lwX-qVg.
Courtship Forum 