From L – R: Tunji, I and Odunola, back in 2015.

Let me tell you a story that happened to me in my final year in University. It is a story of how a firend make my final year, easy and smooth-free.

Getting to 500l is already tiresome but being in that last lap with a laptop is stressful and here I am without one and with no money to buy one.

But a friend gave me her laptop at a very reduced price after a brief chit-chat with her on a general issue which veered off to laptop’s matter.

You purchased the thing now? If she didn’t sell at that giveaway price, I wouldn’t be able to afford one. I count it as her parting gift and that gift made the final year awesome for me.

For doing that, I won’t forget her.

Now, ask yourself the following questions:

Should I have friends?

Must I have friends? Talkless of having close-knit friends?

What are the essences, benefits and usefulness of friends?

Do I have friends? Are they good friends?

Are mine a good friend?

You may be surprised that I am asking you all those questions. Of course, you have a friend(s) – some casual and some deep. I too have friends across religious, cultural and tribal divides that have spanned more than 20 years.

Recently, I was reading the portion of the Bible where a paralytic man was taken to Jesus Healing and Teaching Crusade and they couldn’t find a way to get him to Jesus but they did something that always amazed me about friends and friendship. Instead of returning their friends home, they did the impossible and the unexpected.

When they could not find a way to do this because of the crowd, they went up on the roof and lowered him on his mat through the tiles into the middle of the crowd, right in front of Jesus. When Jesus saw their faith… So he said to the paralyzed man, “I tell you, get up, take your mat and go home.” Immediately he stood up in front of them, took what he had been lying on and went home praising God. Everyone was amazed and gave praise to God. They were filled with awe and said, “We have seen remarkable things today.” Luke 5:19 – 26 NIV

Because of this man’s friends, 4 things happened:

1. He was healed
2. He was forgiven of his sin
3. He praised God.
4. People praised God.

And that is how God wants your friendship to be.

A friend in need, is a friend indeed.

God made us want and need friendship. But some friendships got entangled in comparison and competition. Some friendships lack healthy boundaries while some friendships need a tune up and some need to be cancelled. (How to have healthy friendships’ devotional plan emphasis mine) but first who is a friend?

Fun-fact: The word friend was mentioned 155 times in the Bible.

According to Advanced Oxford Dictionary, a friend is a person you know very well and regard with affection and trust.

Secondly, why should we even have friends? The purposes of friendship are numerous, some of them are:

1. Friends are useful for carrying us.

Like the paralytic man in Luke 5, we all need friends who will carry us in prayers, words of encouragement, helps, supports and advice like most of David’s friends.

2. We are Relational Beings.

God did not create anyone to be stand-alone. He created us to have a relationship with Him and fellow human beings like us (father, mother, brother, sister and friend). So one of the channels of fulfilling that purpose of God is through quality friendship.

3. To solve problem together.

Since you can’t be alone courtesy of the fact that you are a relational being, God doesn’t want you to tackle the problem alone. He doesn’t want you to bottle up the feeling. He wants you to talk to someone who is in the best position to hear your real and unreal cries and who is the best position, if not someone you regard with affection and trust?

4. Friends are constant lovers.

Like that age-long proverb that says that a friend in need, is a friend indeed. A good friend loves you like Jonathan loves David. He/she also desires and strives to have you as a better individual.

A friend loves at all time… Proverbs 17:17 (AMP).

5. Even God have friends.

God have friends. Abraham is God’s friend, so is David. So therefore if we have friends, we are God-like.

Jesus even called us His friends, if we obey Him (John 15:14-15).

The cloud of witnesses about us have friends while they are in these mortal bodies.

6. Friends help our ‘visions.’

I needed a friend to see what I couldn’t. The truth. So often we look at the details all over the landscape—the millions of trees. And we miss the forest. Those overarching truths that cover us and provide shade and security and keep us grounded.

Now to answer, our question, we should have friends albeit good ones.

In conclusion, the question before you and mine now is; are mine a good friend to my friend or not? Do I even have good friends?