Topic 1 – Dear Woman, this is why my wife hated me during pregnancy
Welcome to my Blog. Thanks for following, sharing and commenting. I love you all.
Now, this series tagged The Tales of A Nursing Dad (#talesofaNursingDad) is aimed at telling the stories of pregnancy from a man’s perspective using my wife’s pregnancy and our nursing adventures as example. After all, we are nursing for my little jewel, Zoe Mofifólúwa together and it will run for as many series as possible both here, on YouTube and Facebook.
Now, Dear woman, I beg you in the name of the Lord and His mercies, by all means, possible, do this thing called marriage with a godly, kind, and responsible man.
Pregnancy is another reality on its own and it requires the joint efforts of both intending mum and dad to successfully and easily carried it to full term.
Pregnancy changed my wife’s physique. Her legs swell. She was vomiting for 3 months nonstop during the first intake and I can factually tell you that between the first and the second, her body didn’t return to the pre-pregnancy era. It will change yours too therefore you need an understanding man beside you who is assuring you your physicality doesn’t matter. You are carrying his baby.
My wife’s emotion was played with by pregnancy hormones. She will be happy in the morning before evening, the mood has swung to what she can not even explain. My wife was not insulting but let’s just leave what happened during those beautiful periods. Dear sister, hormones will play tricks on you during gestation, you need a good man beside you who knows that what is happening to you is beyond you.
Furthermore, many unpleasant things will happen during pregnancy. Your face may swell. Legs may follow suit. You may vomit throughout. I even heard a lady who coughed for 9 months nonstop. You make become what you can’t describe. You may be happy in the morning, moody in the afternoon, and sad at night or vice versa. Your mental, spiritual, and physical health will not be spared either. What can make the journey easy, comforting, soothing, and worthwhile for you is the presence of a kind and understanding hubby.
Lastly, dear woman, I am repeating myself, marriage is enough stress than doing it with an ungodly man and pregnancy is further stressful than planning to do alone or unkind man.
I hope you hear me well and clearly. Tomorrow is for another day, another tale.
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Hebrew 🇮🇱 שלום כולם. אני משתמש במדיום הזה כדי לאחל לכולם חג פסח שמח. מי ייתן וכוחה של תחיית המתים יפעל עבורך בעוצמה בשם ישוע.
Thank God for the blessings of godly teachings by His servants and the gifts of powerful Christian writers through books, I can realistically say, nothing caught me unaware in my marital experiences.
My expectations weren’t dashed because they have been pruned through the experience and knowledge of Christian authors who write on marriage and relationships.
Dear, reading books on marriage will save you and your marriage before it even begins as you won’t be able to learn everything about marriage during premarital counseling.
But get this right from the start; it’s not by reading books but by applying the principles therein
Now, let me recommend 12 of such fantastic books:
1. Bible
The best book you should read in preparation for marriage is your Bible.
In this Greatest Book of All Time, God, the creator of the beautiful union called Marriage has already told you everything He has to tell you and everything you ought to know about marriage, parenting, sex, romance, and life generally.
Matter of fact, any other books you want to read about marriage should be about the explanation of what the Word of God said about a specific subject matter. No addition or subtraction.
Furthermore, I urged you to try to read it through, i.e., Genesis to Revelation, at least, once before you settle down to having a family because you might not have the opportunity later.
How can you achieve that? If you read 3 chapters per day, you will cover all the chapters in a year, and if you need a Bible Reading Plan for A Year, my friend, Oladele Damilare got you covered here.
2. How To Choose a Life Partner – 156 Questions to ask – Bimbo Odukoya.
I read this book over a decade ago and it still ring a bell in me.
This book listed 156 questions you ought to ask in courtship and the likely answers.
3. No More Two; God’s Principles for Marriage – Gbile Akanni.
This godly book by a world renowned pastor and brother talks about how to create a one-plus-one equal-to-one kind of matrimony. Very powerful book.
4. Single without Singe – Segun Ariyo
An insightful book on courtship, sexual purity, dating, and wedding. You can’t read this masterpiece and still be interested in pleasing the crowd during your wedding ceremony.
5. The Tearless Courtship – Alade Joel.
This one was powerfully written to prevent you from constant heartbreak. It takes it up from what is the definition of Christian courtship, the stages of courtship, 50 plays, 50 questions, and ends with the 7 rules of courtship for singles. Read on Amazon here
6. God doesn’t want you to be a virgin – Alade Joel
God’s will and plan for His children about sex is more than being a virgin. Infact it’s not his sole purpose for you to be one rather He demanded more from you.
This book highlights what is God will and purpose for you as a Christian single in this over-sexualized world concerning sex before and after Marriage. Discover here
7. Things I Wish I’d Known Before We Got Married – Gary Chapman.
You have probably heard about 5 love languages by Gary Chapman but to me, though that is his most popular book but Things I Wish I’d Known Before We Got Married is the bomb.
The number one thing you should know now is that like Mother, like Daughter is not a fluke. It is a reality.
This is the book that saved my relationship as it helps pruned all the nonsensical beliefs I had prior having any defined romantic relationship.
8. The 4 Seasons of Marriage; Secrets to a Lasting Marriage – Gary Chapman.
This masterpiece from Dr. Gary literally walk you through all the four seasons of marriage namely Autumn, Spring, Winter, and Summer.
Get it. Read and Apply it.
9. The 5 Love Languages. The Secrets to love that lasts – Gary Chapman.
You have heard about this bestseller that teaches you to speak to your spouse in a love language he or she understands.
A must-read for intending couple
Read and apply diligently.
8. Maintaining Sexual Purity – Sam and Folashade Oloyede.
Not only have I been under the ministration of these authors several time but they are also our family mentor and this point outlined in this book was a guiding light during my days weaknesses.
Among Christians, sexual purity is the norm, the standard and the code but how do you cope when it seems everyone is doing it. Get this amazing book and read it via a DM (08135446693).
10. His Needs, Her Needs: Building an Affair-Proof Marriage – Willard Harry Jr.
Prevention, they say is better than cure. I just read this and it really bless my understanding. This classic lists 5 things each for a man and woman’s need to prevent your partner from cheating on you.
11. Saving Your Marriage Before it starts – Les and Leslie Parrot.
Do you want to have a happy and fulfilling marriage? If yes, then this book is the right one for you. Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts is a wonderful book that shows you how your actions today will affect your future marriage.
This book will help you uncover the different myths in marriage, learn how to communicate properly with your spouse, discover the effective way to solve conflicts, manage your finances, and have a great sex life!
12. The Sacred Marriage – What if God Designed Marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy – Gary Thomas.
The idea that marriage is meant primarily to sanctify us has changed my entire view of marriage. God redeems the hard parts of our lives to make us more like Him, and that’s a beautiful way to approach those hardships we all experience in marriage.
Other worthy reads:
13. The power of a praying wife – Stormie Ormatian (for ladies).
14. The Fatherhood Principles – Myles Munroe (for men).
Reflection: Except Saving Your Marriage Before It Begins, (which I promise to read before the end of May), I have read all the aforementioned titles. Now, recommend a book for me and two, how many have your read from this list?
There is a lady in her right sense who is ready to take the plunge with a known abuser.
There is a man who has decided willingly to marry a lazy woman.
Somebody is willing to date that dirty uncouth individual
Even if he or she is the original Satan, someone is willing to do the relationship with such a person.
In fact, for every ‘he is stubborn, he doesn’t listen to anyone,’ someone is saying, ‘I love him.’ ‘She is proud,’ someone is calling her LOML.
He/she is an unbeliever, funnily enough, a supposed believer is ready to be unequally yoked.
But you are not the one. You should never be the one.
But who is perfect? None but the imperfection of humans shouldn’t make you choose the bad from the worst. As far as your marital choice is concerned, it should be selecting the best spouse from the available bests.
Furthermore, they can marry abusers, cheaters, lazy, dirty, unbelieving, and or uncouth individuals but my dear, you should never be part of them. Because you are a Christian and God wants the best for you.
It may be them but it can never be me. It may be them but it can never be my children. It may be them but it should never be you
That is why I am rejecting evil (mo tàka òsì dànù) on your behalf in Jesus name (Amen)
For more prayer points, pre-order by SECURING YOUR MARRIAGE BEFORE IT BEGINS here
This scene happened in #Enoch – a biopic of Pastor E. A. Adeboye when she went to tell her dad about the young man asking her out
Daddy Folu: why do you want to marry this guy?
Folu: he is humble and has a sense of duty.
That Folu’s statement is that of someone with purpose, clarity, and picking character over charisma. She didn’t even mention intelligence.
Now, ask many sisters and brothers in our churches today how a godly man/woman fitting for marriage should look and behave, see them listing the attributes of an ungodly celeb.
Dear, a kindhearted individual is far better than a tongue-blasting one.
Why? Because you will need the uses of the fruits of the Spirit than his gifts.
You will need the use of love, tolerance, understanding, kindheartedness, industriousness, etc than you will need the use of raising the dead, speaking in tongues, casting demons out, etc., in your marriage.
I repeat, when shopping for a potential partner, pick the fruit over the gift.
My dear, If she can’t sing, speak in tongue, or preach but she is a real Christian with the fruits, marry her.
Even if you can pinpoint a single gift of the Spirit in him, but you are sure of his salvation experience, he is marriable.
One of the things I don’t joke with as a single (with or without partner) is prayer and one of such prayer is that, God Almighty, wherever my wife is , make it difficult for her to make a future-damaging mistake.
Believe me dear, that prayer was marvelously answered because God actually prevented her from many errors as He prevented me too from future-damaging mistakes.
Why all these stories? The moral is; Your marriage can be protected, preserved, prevented and saved from destiny destroyers, home breakers, potential outlaws that may want to disguise as in-laws, side chicks, sickness and what-have-you before you even have a fiance or fiancee.
You kids can be put under the shadow of the Almighty before you even know who their father or mother will be.
You can settle your partner’s friends, work, your neighbor when married, now before you know them.
You can declare peace, joy, and righteousness into your family now and to shock you you can prevent your partner from making life shattering mistake now like I did for mine.
Here about 20 prayer points from my incoming ebook SECURING YOUR MARRIAGE BEFORE IT BEGINS (A PRAYER GUIDE):
Thank you Jesus for a glorious home, you will give me.
Thank you for my spouse and my in-laws. I glorify Your Name because we will be friends.
Over my children and every stage of their lives, hallowed be thy Name in Jesus Name.
Dear Heavenly Father, I ask in Your might Name that every potential partner that will be coming my way will be a godly man/woman
Mighty Jehovah, in the name of Jesus, go into every stage, period and season of my marriage and take preeminence control before my arrival.
I pronounce my marriage yours in Jesus Name.
I pronounce my partner Yours in Jesus Name.
I declared my children Yours in Jesus Name.
Every resource that I needed to be a responsible spouse, I received it in Jesus Name.
I prayed that my marriage will be a springboard for the spread of the Gospel.
Precious Father, strengthen and guard my marriage against the evil one, his schemes and systems in Jesus Name.
Everybody that will be connected to me through marriage will praised You for the union.
Pre-order your own copy through the scanning of the QR code below:
Oh Lord, let Your visits be a constant in my family
I proclaim peace into my marriage.
My spouse’s siblings will know the Lord in Jesus Name.
Give me/us Your Spirit of wisdom and understanding in Jesus Name.
I cancel every generational debts and curse in Jesus Name.
I demolish every evil family pattern from my marriage in Jesus Name.
Thank You for You shall make my family a double harvest of answered prayers in Jesus Name.
Thank You that everything that has to do with my marriage has been settled in Jesus Name
Thank You for the salvation of spouse and kids
All glory, honour, adoration and blessings be unto Your Precious Name in Jesus Name.
To preorder your own copy of SECURING YOUR MARRIAGE BEFORE IT BEGINS, click here
Enoch – a Biopic of Pastor E. A. Adeboye is a film biography of Baba Adeboye, the General Overseer of The Redeemed Christian Church of God Worldwide.
It is a must-watch for all Christians of all grades. Click below to watch
Enoch – a biopic of Pastor E. A. Adeboye
I have shared the general lessons from the movies here. Now, here are 5 specific lessons that will be useful for Christian courtship:
1. Let unbelievers marry themselves.
Young Enoch and his young wife Folu were unbelievers when they met and marry. They finally got born again after their nuptials.
I believe it somehow helps their marriage as there won’t be any cases of one disturbing another with his or her spirituality.
Dear you, by experience, I can substantiate to you that Marriage has its own enough stress, do not add the stress of an unbelieving partner. The joy of a Christian family is when both know and are serving God but one uninterested partner can cause problem to the family because his/her life is open to devil to fiddle with.
2. Introduce That Single Brother to another Single Sister or vice versa.
Continuing, I have written about potential places to meet your spouse and I listed through recommendations of friends, family, and mentors. (Read here). Enoch met his wife through his friend, Dele who is Folu’s cousin. Dele even supervised the project of locating her house 😀.
Your pretty single beautiful sister can be introduced to your friend as a potential partner.
Sister, you won’t marry your brother, introduce him to your Christian friend.
You to ask your friend about that single sibling, cousin, or opposite sex friend, colleague, member, etc. Who knows if yours will end like theirs?
3. The Simplest is Christian Courtship.
He asked her to become her wife because to him out of the women he has met, she is priceless. That’s a proposal. A clear statement of purpose.
She accepted after telling him that she will only answer by carrying her family along. This is acceptance. A very clear yes.
Their parents met and they wedded.
Dearest, anything else outside of the above is alien to the Bible.
4. Marriage is the reason.
When Enoch Adejare Adeboye wooed Folu, from day one he declared his intent which is marriage.
Therefore, the first, second, and only reason for courtship among believers is Marriage. Doing a relationship for 3 years, then followed by kneeling to ask the most ridiculous question in the world, will you marry me is not of this kingdom.
I speak more on this and lesson 3 in my book, The Tearless Courtship – a simpler guide for Christian courtship and dating. Download here
5. Simple concise expression is enough.
Enoch asked his lover out with a simple and concise 21-word sentence
My brother, you don’t need 21 days of fasting and prayer plus a dream to woo a lady. Even if you do or have one, keep it with you until it’s necessary to spill it.
Similarly, it doesn’t have to look spectacular to be godly, my dear sister. Your future partner may not come with dreams and trance and but once it comes up in the garb of Christlikeness, don’t delay your answer.
Those are the lessons for your courtship. If you have watched the movie any other lesson? Share with us in the comment section while sharing this post. Thanks
Tell me one reason why God won’t punish my ex. She betrayed me. She trampled on my trust. She served me a hot breakfast. After all, I’ve done for her 😭😭😭
What causes the issue? Our problem started with the pic below
After wishing her a pleasurable birthday and affirming me as her love. Then a message inbox, followed by a painful but necessary breakfast a year after. Was it painful? It was ooo. So unbearable I have to doubt my value of generosity and trust in a romantic relationship (my wife kuku part-pay in the sin she didn’t commit but that’s a story for another day). So painful I have to converse with someone on Facebook.
Now tell me why someone who broke the heart of His dear son won’t suffer.
My dear if this is your reasoning about your ex, you are dead wrong because God will not punish your ex because he breaks your heart.
God won’t make her marry wrongly because she left you.
Why? for the following reasons:
God won’t punish your ex because, for some of us, that split must happen so that you can have sense.
Secondly, perhaps, your ex is indirectly working for God because God knows that your union will be a disaster for His kingdom.
Three, God is a just God. He doesn’t think like us. He forgives sin.
Four, where is your Christianity if you wish evil on fellow human being, sometimes a fellow Christian?
Fifthly, my dear stop cursing, cussing, and whining about your ex, the Almighty won’t kill the person because you want him or her dead. He alone is sovereign.
And lastly, what gain will your ex’s misfortune give you? Assuredly, it won’t give your car, a happy home, house, promotion, career progression, long life, and prosperity.
Your ex’s misfortune won’t give any good thing of life save bitterness, evil thought, and envy to your being.
She said to me, ‘since we are going to marry, let’s do it.’
I said no. Number one we are not married. Two, it’s ungodly.
‘Hmmm, what about kissing, or do you want to say that one too is a sin.’
‘It’s not but it can lead us to where we don’t know,’ I replied.
She brought up the subject of pornography.
I replied watching porn is one of the surest ways to destroy the marriage before it even starts because it places you and your spouse in fantasy – unrealistic expectations; a world created by video directors, videographers, video editors, and actors.
Your marital sexual life will be utterly destroyed because you can’t attain a world that doesn’t exist.
Two, watching porn is promoting sin and encouraging sinners not to repent.
By downloading porn materials, you are encouraging them to put out more ungodly content.
By visiting their site, you are telling them that more sinful materials are needed.
Watching porn is one of the surest ways to destroy the marriage before it even starts
Liking and viewing their pages only mean one thing; more money from the motinesation of their idea which in turn you are contributing monetarily to Satan’s kingdom.
I refused to do adverts for Satan in my life.
God forbids I am unwilling tools for the propagation of evil and its agenda.
Lastly, this evil will open doors for other evils like the objectification of the opposite sex, insanity, sodomy, etc.
It may look harmless but the repercussions are far fetch.
May the grace of God be with us.
Disclaimer: the story at the beginning of this write-up is fictional.
‘Maa kawe,’ he cried. His mantra is, ‘somebody shout Hallelujah.’
‘I want to go Grammar School,’ he kept telling his parents despite knowing about their abject poverty.
He did not only go to school but he won all the prizes and awards at the completion of his secondary school which he did under signed IOU to repay all his outstanding school fees, no shoes, and borrowed suit and shoes for prize and valedictory ceremony.
Today, he has PhD in Applied Mathematics and numerous honorary doctorate.
He was nicknamed Ade-Maths and today is his birthday. The boy who has 5 birthdays for his 5 different girlfriends 😄😀😄.
My sister, husband no scarce na you wan use 1 year to pray
The father who is now a God’s General trailblazing for Christ.
Therefore, join me in wishing Pastor E. A Adeboye, The General Overseer of The Redeemed Christian Church of God Worldwide, a happy 81st birthday
It was a journey of faith, lack, loyalty vision, joy, and power
1. A visionary man will win no matter how. He will win. The boy ‘Deboye was adamant that he will go to school no matter his parents’ wretchedness. Today, the story is clear.
2. The Baba and his wife deserve every good thing they are enjoyingnow. Baba was from a very poor family so tey they are celebrating the purchase of an umbrella.
See also his passion to preach everywhere.
Observe their prayer life and their obedience to godly instructions.
Take notice of their loyalty to their G.O.
3. Document your vision in the presence of loyal witnesses. If not for irrefutable documentation by Revd. Akindayomi and the witnesses at the transfer of mantle at Tulsa Oklahoma, the young Adeboye wouldn’t have been allowed to head the church.
4. Our fathers are also naughty during their era. Ade-Maths has different birthdays for his different girlfriends 😄🥺😀
5. And lastly, Bro Boye asked Folu out. She told her father. Her father summoned the young man and they are married. My sister, husband no scarce na you wan use 1 year to pray.
Vladimir Putin’s decision to invade Ukraine led to death of thousands on both sides, destruction of properties and worse of all, economic sanctions on his country and his close pals. Abrahamovic being one of them.
Now, that VP’s decision affected Roman Abrahamovic by force selling his darling club, pride of London, the only club in London with 2 UCL trophies Chelsea FC to Todd Boelhy which eventually led to Thomas Tuchel sack and hiring of Graham Potter.
The rest is now history but one thing is sure; without Putin’s invasion of Ukraine, current Chelsea problem won’t be happening.
Now, how does this concern you? One set of people you should avoid like a plague are those that believe their decision only affect them.
As in they believe that what they do or doesn’t do doesn’t affect others. As in set of, I own nobody anything.
Run away from them.
Because your present and past decisions affect even your unborn generations, your neighbors, church members, colleagues, etc.
You are not just choosing a spouse for yourself. You are choosing a coparent, a grandparent for your kids and an ancestor for your progeny.
Will they blessed you for giving them such a mother, father or grandparent or curse you?
You are not just relocating, you are determining another environment for your kids. It affects them too.
You are moving away from those who probably can’t bear not having you around.
You decision affects a wide array of people. People you don’t even know.
Now, how do you make a good choice? Acknowledge God in all ways and lean not on your own understanding.
Courtship Forum 